Thursday, 02 July 2009

• Birth as designed!

  I attended a birth today that has truly renewed my belief in the very real fact that God has designed our bodies to give birth truly wonderfully.   Not only does He create new life by fashioning it deep within a mother's womb in secret (as Psalm 139 says), but He also enables the mother's body to grow it and nourish it, and finally to birth a new life. (and then after that, to be able to nourish that new life!)

  This mom - J and her husband - R are first time parents.  I met them when  they came to prenatal classes.   Very lovely couple with a complete belief in birth itself and that everything would go fine.  She was planning on giving birth in the hospital, which is fine, but she also had the option to birth at home I reminded her as she's under the care of midwives.     She wanted to dance through labour and had no fears about it - and neither did R.    So they planned a homebirth - and even decided to try a waterbirth.     Her due date came and went, and she stayed calm and relaxed.   She didn't want the midwives to examine her.    She just believed that the baby would come when he was ready.   

  Now part of me dislikes that.  I'll admit it.  If I'm climbing a hill, I need to see the top - I keep looking up to see how far I have to go.   When I was in labour, and before going into labour, I needed to know .....what's my cervix doing?    That's me.   I also like hearing from  my clients "I'm almost 50% effaced!"  or the opposite "she couldn't reach my cervix yet".  It SORT OF helps me figure out what's going on.  Well, J didn't care to know.     It was an exercise in patience and trust for me too.

  This morning at 4:15 a.m. the phone rang.  It was J.  "my water just broke!"  She sounded so excited.  Because everything was normal and no contractions were present, I suggested she try and get more sleep.  She had complete faith that labour and birth would work.     I tried to sleep, but couldn't really.  Had to figure out how the day's events were going to unfold - with or without me!   We were scheduled, as a family, to go on the 11:00 sailing of a Harbour Cruise in Vancouver ....and now, do I go?  not go?    Murphy's law says that if I do go, she'll call me ...but if I don't go, she won't call.       However, at 7:10 or so, the decision was made for me, when R called and said "J's contractions are 2 minutes apart and getting more intense.  Please come!".   

  Her contractions had begun about half hour after her water broke, but they didn't bother her.  She and R stayed in bed trying to relax.    About 6 a.m she could still talk through contractions and had gotten up, made her bed, gotten dressed and was "putzing around" (her words) to pass the time.     But all of a sudden at 6:30 the contractions started requiring more effort on her part.    (I wish they had called me then!).    

  So I'm driving the 15 minute drive or so (in my mom's car, so Martin could have the van to go to the cruise which I was now going to miss) ....... and half way there get a phone call from R "J says she feels like pushing".    

  ACK!  "Tell her to blow.  Where are the midwives?"    "they'll be here in about 25 minutes."   "Oh shucks .....ask her to get on her hands and knees and breathe through those contractions".

  I get there at shortly before 8 a.m and find her on her hands and knees coping beautifully.  What I saw and heard was NOT a woman in transition!  She was quiet, and concentrating on her contractions by breathing quietly.   I asked her if she could move to the bed (she was on the bathroom floor - in a pretty small bathroom).    She mentioned how the urge to push was still there, but less intense than when she'd been standing in the shower.  .   While we waited for the midwives to arrive, R and I kept encouraging her to breathe quietly and not to actively push.   However, one look at her bottom, and I could tell a baby was on his way.     I kept thinking "where are the midwives????  I'm a doula! I don't deliver babies!!!!"    R had set up the pool downstairs (although it wasn't filled with water) .... however, there would be no time whatsoever for her to have the luxury of a waterbirth.  This baby was COMING.

  The midwives got there at around 8:20 and determined - yup - fully dilated, with a baby's head in view.  Phew!   Now here's the awesome part.  Most moms when given the "go ahead" to push, push hard.   And they push with all their might and energy.  Not this mom.  She quietly breathed, slowly pushed - and gently stretched for her baby.   It was quiet, serene and beautiful.   She spoke calmly in between asking us if he was coming closer and how much longer before she could hold her baby.   At one point she said " he's lower, I can feel it".  Completely CALM!      Slowly but surely, she gently birthed his head.    The midwives had her turn over to her back to help loosen the shoulders and with one good push, at 9:01 a.m. he came out - all 8 lb 8 1/2 oz of him!

  He is a GORGEOUS baby!  Now, not all newborns are cute. Some are downright ....... ya, well, you know.   Wrinkly, squished, even bruised.  This baby - gorgeous.   And he was calm and after a few good cries, nice and quiet.   Opened those BIG baby blues and stared all around.  And then proceeded, with some encouragement, to breastfeed as if he'd been doing it all his life.      The hardest part for my client was the delivery of the placenta - required more work on her part!   But - she herself remained calm and peaceful even through the painful moments of a repair.    

  I'm in awe once again.     I love birth.   I just love these women whom I have the honour and privilege of attending - the births of their babies are incredible moments to witness.    And R and J were indeed a wonderful couple to support through this intense time of their lives.  When I left them, you couldn't tell she'd given birth 3 hours previous.  She was showered, dressed and sitting in their "library" holding her newborn son with a look of love that would melt your heart.   

  This was the third FAST birth in a row that I've attended .....and I'm done for awhile.  I think I would love to be a midwife's assistant at homebirths.     I helped with all kinds of things - and it was so much fun.   The other thing that was so great was this was the third birth in a row with the same midwives.     These are the same midwives that have asked Anne and myself to teach our prenatal classes out of their new clinic.   Just today I popped in to see their new clinic and chatted with one of the midwives for about 45 minutes.    She wants us to design a poster for their clinic "announcing" that Heart and Hands ("our favourite doulas and educators teaching our favourite classes!" - she said) will be teaching out of their midwifery clinic.   I'm so pumped!

  And so thankful to God for being able to witness another wonderful birth.   A friend of ours also just gave birth to a strapping baby boy - she had a VBAC that she'd been hoping for.   My previous client was also a VBAC.  I love sharing in those times too .......such victory!

  Thanks for reading this - and if you're pregnant and waiting for the birth of your baby - trust God! He designed your body to do this amazing work of labour and birth.  Your baby will come when he/she's good and ready - at God's timing.

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